I ran 8 miles on Wednesday. I ate rice/banana/peanut butter for breakfast and then I used Island Boost while on the run. It was a wonderful run, I felt solid throughout and my subsequent days were not filled with GI distress. That was supposed to be the barometer for whether or not I would withdraw from a race I’m registered for and if I would sign up for some other races to get early registration deadlines. Well, I didn’t withdraw, but I also didn’t get around to signing up for other races and missed the deadlines. A 50% savings is a great deal to let slip out of your fingers!
I’m supposed to go to work later this month. Like, actually GO to work, as opposed to telecommuting. I’m dreading that because I just don’t know how to make it work with the baby. If I had to be there for an 11:00ish meeting, I would make the drive there and back in one day. But I am supposed to be there for a very early meeting. I can’t just leave town for a couple of days and leave her behind. While I’m expected to become a bad employee as a mother, my husband is expected to maintain his “work ethic” plus do long hours like he has to every busy season. The whole balance between mother/father isn’t fair. (I can’t get over this!)
Additionally my husband has been talking to me about days to take vacations this year. The thought of going on vacation scares and intimidates me now. It just seems overwhelming to think about all the stuff that is needed to travel with a baby. I know I can’t just hold off on ever going anywhere until she’s old enough to pack for herself and take care of herself, but still… I feel like I can barely keep my head together to do my job and take care of her. The thought of planning and preparing for a trip seems like the thing that would break me!
I’m feeling better this week in terms of fatigue, but still I’m overly tired. I hit the corners of my kitchen countertops and doorknobs with my hips and my balance is off. Sometimes I’m scared that I will tip over while holding the baby. My mom suggested that we introduce solids now to see if Alex will go back to sleeping through the night. Stuff online says that isn’t really a solution. My doctor said that exclusively breastfed babies shouldn’t have solids until 6-months. I hate all the conflicting information out there. I guess eventually I just need to stop reading things and do what feels right to me as a mom. But I also admit I’m not looking forward to starting her on solids. The poop changes, the messes that come from it, doing this all by myself while my hubby works… milk is so much easier! But then again, I don’t want her to be that kid that can walk up and get her lunch herself… when she’s not on solids, you know what I mean? But then again, if she’s not dependent upon my body for food, then travel might be easier? She can eat other foods, other people can feed her, I don’t have to worry about feeding/pumping to alleviate discomfort in me, I can stop using nursing pads…
It’s a new month and I thought I would give you an update on my resolutions.
- Am I stressing less and laughing more? Nope, probably not. I try to I remind myself to do that… so maybe in a way I’m working on that.
- Hanging stuff on the walls? I hung a bulletin board on the wall in my office. And there is tape stuck to the wall indicating where my medal case should go.
- My one new outfit for the month turned into a couple of items of clothing. I’m actually pretty excited to spruce up my wardrobe. But I’ll call the official outfit a pair of purple skinny jeans and an animal print wrap top, both came from Target so they weren’t that much of a splurge. I liked the jeans so much I bought a second pair. They feel a lot better than my old jeans that are constantly falling down and making me worry I’m showing off crack. Also, I need to figure out how to take better photos of myself for this feature. (lighting, posing, uh… putting on makeup)
I’m turning off Livefyre comments again. They never sync in Twitter conversations, it’s started giving me grief in actually being able to reply to people and I never get alerts to new comments on the site even though I’ve got my settings set to do so. I also think it’s a deterrent to people actually commenting. If you’ve ever thought about commenting here on my site but were deterred or stopped by the Livefyre system, let me know… in a comment! 🙂
I signed up for Katy Widrick‘s 28-Day Blog Challenge over on ChallengeLoop. Perhaps this will be the impetus to finally move my hosting to a different host and update my theme. Ever since the site crash around when the baby was born, there have been too many quirks that I need to get cleaned up! So I guess the Livefyre removal is my first step in the challenge!
When I went into Alex’s room this morning, I thought I would have to wake her up because she wasn’t whining yet. (This was at 6:30, after she’d already had a 4:50 wake-up call.) But when I opened the door I heard very quiet babbling. I turned on the lights and found her turned around and playing with Vitamins the Reindeer. Why is the deer called Vitamins? Because it has some stupid label on the front that says “Vitamins” on it. I don’t know if that is the brand or if it’s supposed to be the name, but that toy is now christened “Vitamins the Reindeer”.